Another Day Without... Poor Heidi

Still no breastmilk for Heidi. This morning was really hard for her. I wouldn't give her breastmilk and she had a tough time accepting it this morning. She was pretty grumpy most of the morning afterwards too. Tonight, though, she didn't ask me for milk... She also didn't want to go to bed in her own bed tonight either. Instead, she asked to go to sleep in "Mommy's bed." I felt kind of bad telling her no, and that she had to go to bed in her own bed. I guess she thought she would see if she could sleep in my room since I wasn't feeding her anymore... If one thing changes, why can't her place of sleep change too? Maybe she just wanted to be close to me, since we aren't having that bonding time that we used to have with breastfeeding. I did rock her for about half a minute and brushed her teeth... and she went to bed in her crib. I would have rocked her a little longer, but she didn't want to. She just wanted to go to bed. I wonder if tomorrow morning will be as tough as this morning was on her. So far, the morning feeding seems to be the hardest for her to give up.

Tonight, we went to a reunion briefing for our brigade. There were maybe 60 spouses or so there. They talked about things like what to expect when our husbands come home (and having unrealistic expectations), the signs of PTSD, how people change over a year, the need for open communication, how and when we will be notified about when/where we will reunite with our soldiers, etc. When Brian gets home, he will not be allowed to drive within 24-hours of his landing back in the states. Also, he will have a three-day pass, but he will not be allowed to leave the 150 mile radius in that time. Then, he will also have different classes/reintegration training that he will need to go to.

Someone asked if it would be okay for them to bring their dog to the meeting place when a flight of soldiers comes in. Then, someone else mentioned how their child was afraid of big dogs. I don't know why someone would feel the need to bring the family dog to pick up their husband/dad who has been gone for 15 months. Also, the dog may poop on the field where we will be reunited and someone may step in it... and then someone will have to smell dog poop on their shoe for the whole ride home. There are going to be probably at least a hundred people/family members at each of the reunions whenever flights get in. Why would someone want to bring their dog into all of that chaos? People are going to be scrambling across a field to find their soldier/family in a mass heard. That's just my opinion though. I guess to some people, their dogs are their kids. I just think the dogs could wait at home for 20 minutes or so.

I had Heidi put into the free day care in the room next door from where the briefing was tonight. It was a LONG meeting... I think we were there for about three hours. They had several speakers (soldiers, a social worker, a family advocacy representative, a dietician, the rear detachment people who will be letting people know their husbands are on their way home, etc). When we walked out of the building, Heidi pointed up to the dark sky and said "Daddy fly-high-in-a-sky in helicoter." She must think he is always up there somewhere flying around, since he isn't here. Poor Heidi.... Mommy is cutting her off (from breastfeeding) and Daddy isn't ever here... Another day without...